Conversations | Fresh air

Welcome to my first blog post ever!!

Littlevisuals

First of all, English is not my first language or second one and I'm quite insecure about this, but I've decided to challenge myself so here I go.

Hi? Hi is a good way to start a conversation

You can call me A (not Pretty Little Liars related), I'm just an 18 years old girl trying to find herself and a place in this crazy and strange world. 

I just feel lost and surrounded by emptiness. My mind is a mess; I'm not happy and enjoying life at all. I'm feeling so tired and it's the kind of tired that sleep won't fix, I don't have the energy or motivation so I wake up late, I hardly leave the house and I'm always making excuses to not get things done. I often find myself thinking that everything is just too much and I have a million things that I want to do, but I don't know where to start.

  

I feel like I don't have a connection to the world as if I don't have a part in society. I've started feeling disconnected with others, having feelings of loneliness when surrounded by people and I've become antisocial, so I'd rather be alone because I don't feel good surrounded by others and I've become emotionally reserved and difficult to connect with.

Had enough of those feelings so I've decided to stand up for myself and start doing all the things that make me smile because it's about time. I've been focusing my time and my mind on the wrong things rather than focusing my energy on the positive aspects of my life. I'm nothing really special but I got a lot to say so I'm trying to stop caring too much about the opinions of people who do not matter and be courageous enough to share what's on my mind because I really really want to. I'm kind of pessimist, so I want to start trying to think more positively no matter what. It's time to take responsibility for my own wellbeing and I want to feel good and fulfilled so I'm looking forward to actually live, seek adventures, appreciate myself, others and the world around me because I truly want to and I'm sick of feeling like nothing is going fine without even understanding why.

Just by writing and sharing this text I'm feeling more content and ready to start a new journey. This is me trying to stop being so afraid of expressing my feelings and thoughts. 

Lots of hugs, A